


The Setup

by Duck_Life



Category: New Mutants, X-Force (Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Blind Date, F/F, Friendship, Humor, Julio Loves Redheads, M/M, Teenagers, the new mutants/x-force kids are gen z
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-06
Updated: 2019-01-06
Packaged: 2019-10-05 14:25:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17326697
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Duck_Life/pseuds/Duck_Life
Summary: Tabitha promised Rictor she'd set him up with a guy, but she's out of time and not sure what to do. Then Shatterstar drops out of the sky.





	The Setup

“So I told him I already  _ had _ somebody lined up for him,” Tabs laments, setting her can of Coke precariously on the Danger Room console. 

“Which you don't,” Dani guesses.

“Yeah, doy, of course I don't, Legs,” Tabitha sighs. “He's gonna be so pissed at me.”

“Why don't you just tell him the date changed his mind?” Dani asks.

“If I do that he's gonna think the guy looked him up on Facebook and thought he was lame, or ugly,” Tabs points out. “I can't do that to Ric's self esteem. It's low enough already.” 

Other members of the New Mutants, including some of their new recruits, have been training down in the Danger Room for the past hour. Bored of watching them, Dani decides to help out Tabitha with the latest predicament she’s gotten herself into. “What kind of guys is Ric into?”

“Redheads,” Tabs says, thinking back to Rictor's giant crush on Rusty Collins during their X-Factor days. “Does Terry Cassidy have, like, a hot brother?”

“Nope, just an evil uncle.” Dani huffs. “Do you not know a single person who would be a good fit for him?”

“Not really,” Tabs sighs. “I mean, all the gay guys I know are either too old, already in relationships or— ugh— Canadian.”

“Valid,” Dani says. She turns back to the training session down below… which doesn't look like it did two minutes ago. “Hey, is something going on down there?”

The drill was for Domino, Jimmy and Berto. But there's someone else in the Danger Room now, someone clad in white gladiatorial armor sporting a long red ponytail.

* * *

It doesn’t take long for them to find out that Red is an interdimensional refugee from the Mojoverse. Within an hour, Cable’s got him signed up for his new “X-Force” operation, despite the fact that the guy doesn’t even know how to read an analog clock.

“Poor guy,” Dani sighs. “I know all about Mojoworld. I can see why he’d want to get the hell out of there.”

“Yeah,” Tabby agrees. “Plus, he’s kind of a hunk,” she adds, as if that has anything to do with anything. Then Tabitha got an idea. An awful idea. Tabitha got a wonderful, awful idea. “Heyyy—”

“No way,” Dani shuts her down.

“You don’t even know what I was gonna say.”

“You were going to say that you could pair up Shatterstar with Rictor.”

“So you agree, it’s a good idea.”

Dani whirls toward her, scowling. “No! He’s been on Earth for, like, an afternoon. There’s no way he’s ready for  _ a date _ .”

“Well, we’ll just agree to disagree,” Tabitha says, striding across the X-Mansion living room to stand in front of Shatterstar. Up close, he’s a lot taller. And hunkier. And, perhaps most importantly, he’s got that mane of red, red hair. “Hi there! I’m Tabitha, but everyone calls me Boom-Boom,” she says, reaching out a hand to shake. Shatterstar just stares at it. “Anyway, I have a proposition for you, Shatty— can I call you Shatty? —  I'll give you twenty bucks to go out with my friend,” Tabitha says. 

“What are bucks?” Shatterstar inquires, and then more quietly, “What are friends?”

“Jesus,” Dani mumbles.

* * *

The thing is, Tab has a tendency to get everyone around her roped into whatever hare-brained schemes she comes up with. Which is how, within an hour, she’s got Shatterstar onboard for the date, with Dani reluctantly aiding and abetting.

“It's fine,” Tabs says, batting away Dani's concerns. “The act just has to hold up for an evening. Rictor will probably decide they don't click, but he'll appreciate me for trying to set him up. And he'll never know the truth.”

“Unless he asks someone else. Or thinks about your Jenga tower of lies for, like, two seconds.”

“Stop being such a sourface, Legs.” 

“Why do you keep calling me Legs? I'm like an inch taller than you.”

“Yeah but like half my height is all attitude,” Tabs says matter-of-factly.

* * *

It takes about 29 minutes of wheedling to convince Shatterstar to remove his headgear, and nearly another half hour of asking and explaining for him to let Tabitha touch his hair. “I took almost a whole semester of beauty school,” she says. “I know what I'm doing.”

“I had a stylist, where I am from,” Shatterstar says, his jaw set. “Treated me like a horse in a show.  _ Fekt _ .”

“Well, we promise Tabs won't do that,” Dani says. “Besides, she's not the horse girl, I am. Would you like another Oreo?”

“I would. Thank you.”

“This is like that scene in ‘Beauty and the Beast,’” Tabby squeals. “I'm like Mrs. Potts and you're like Lumiere.”

“Rictor is Belle?” 

“Yuh.”

“Who's Gaston?” Dani asks.

“Jimmy. Obvs.”

* * *

They get Shatterstar ready in record time and send him off on his date, Dani and Tabitha getting themselves a table across the restaurant so they can keep an eye on what Dani insists is going to be “a catastrophic failure.” 

“So how long have you known Tabitha?” Ric asks, peering at Shatterstar over his menu. 

Shatterstar freezes, thinks. He is supposed to lie, which is like acting. Acting is always easier when it draws from the truth. “For as long as I have been on Earth, I have known Tabitha,” he says. 

Rictor whistles. “Wow. Way back. Jeez, what was she even like when she was younger?”

“Smaller, I presume.”

Ric snorts. Shatterstar takes this to be a positive sign, because Rictor is still smiling. “You're funny.”

“I am?”

“Yeah, and easy to talk to,” Rictor says. 

“I listen,” Shatterstar agrees. “I am good at listening. I am used to it.”

“Well, I don't want to talk too much,” Rictor says, scratching the back of his neck. “I wanna know about you. Tell me about yourself.”

“I… like television,” Shatterstar says.

“Oh, yeah, who doesn't?” Rictor says. Shatterstar frowns. His answer doesn't seem to have been adequate. “What shows?”

“The Office.”

“I love The Office,” Ric says, his face lighting up. He proceeds to start quoting his favorite lines, all of which Shatterstar knows. Television is everywhere on Mojoworld, impossible to get away from. During his time with the Cadre Alliance, he watched as much Earth television as he could, the broadcasts that weren't warped and distorted by Mojo and Major Domo.

* * *

“Oh my god, it's working,” Dani says, staring in awe at Rictor and Shatterstar. “Why is it working?”

“Because, you gorgeous skeptical sunflower,” Tabby says, grinning, “you overlooked one thing. Rictor's as fuckin’ weird as I am.” Across the restaurant, Rictor loudly exclaims about how much bigger Shatterstar's hands are than his.

* * *

“So what did you do before joining up with our sorry asses?” Julio asks later, walking along the sidewalk with his hand brushing Shatterstar's occasionally. 

“I was a gladiator,” Shatterstar says flatly. “Fought in an arena.”

“Oh, jeez,” Julio says. “My friend Berto had to do that once. Must've been awful. How long were you there?”

“Fifteen years.”

“ _ Fif— _ what??  _ Mierda _ , your whole life,” Julio says. He stops walking and just stares at Shatterstar. “Jesus. I'm so sorry.”

“It is not your fault.”

“Yeah, no, I mean uh… I feel sorry that that happened to you,” he explains. “Like, the fact that you went through that makes me sad. That's what I mean.”

Shatterstar nods. “Pity.”

“Sympathy,” Julio corrects him.

“Hm,” says Shatterstar. “No one else has said they are sorry. Cable says he is happy I can fight. Your other friends are impressed or afraid of me. You are the only one to say you are sorry.”

“Oh,” Julio says, unsure how to respond to that. “I, uhm… wait, if you were a gladiator, how did you end up meeting Tabs?”

“Tabitha? I met her when I arrived in this time and on this planet,” he explains.

“This planet?” Ric says, cocking his head to the side. “You mean Earth? Are you not…  _ from _ Earth?”

* * *

Rictor storms into Tabby's room tugging Shatterstar along by the hand, interrupting Tabby in the middle of her painting Dani's nails a salacious shade of red. “Hey Tabs?” he says, irked and irritated. “Where's Shatterstar from?”

Tabby's eyes widen. The hand holding the nail polish brush hovers in the air. “Uh… Queens?”

“Oh really?” Ric says, looking about ready to murder her. “What part of Mojoworld is that?”

“The… the northern part,” Tabs says, shooting a glare at Shatterstar, who looks as befuddled as ever. 

“Dani, you'll tell me the truth,” Ric says, switching tack. “How long have you guys known ’Star?”

“Oh you're calling him a cute nickname now?”

“Tabitha, shut up,” Ric says. “Dani?”

“W- we've known him as long as he's been on Earth,” Dani says honestly, but Rictor's expression gives her pause. “So, uh, today.”

“Yeah, okay,” Ric says. “Next time I ask you to set me up with someone… will be never,” he finishes lamely. “You can't just grab the first guy to drop in from another dimension, capiche?”

“Crystal capiche,” Tabs says. 

“Okay,” Rictor says. 

Shatterstar looks uncomfortable. “I apologize for the role I played in this deception.”

Immediately, Rictor’s expression softens. “No, hey, I’m not mad at you. I mean, you’re brand-new here, so. Also, uh, I had a good time. Did you?”

“The food and conversation were excellent,” Shatterstar says, nodding. “I have to go speak with Lord Cable. I will see you all shortly.” He leaves.

As soon as his footsteps fade away, Rictor spins to face Tabitha. “Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou.”

* * *

“See? Everything worked out fine,” Tabitha says, resuming painting Dani's nails after Rictor leaves. “We should be professional matchmakers.”

“Absolutely,” Dani says, blowing on the nails of her left hand. “You want me to set you up with someone next?”

Tabby gives her a sly look. “Anyone in particular?”

“Maybe a dashing Cheyenne girl with her own flying horse.”

“Sounds good to me.”

 


End file.
